Saturday 4 February 2012

Would you like to go out sometime?

Has anyone ever actually come up with a solution to the problem of where to go on a first date?  It’s hard to chose somewhere that’s not cliché, not too suggestive, doesn’t involve the potential to trail Bolognese sauce down your front and is easy to escape from if things don’t quite go as planned.  Which in my experience happens just a little bit too often.

            A drink always seems like a pretty safe bet, but it can be a challenge to have a proper conversation over background noise.  It’s just not cool to start a rant about being unable to hear yourself think as stag parties chant and the latest chart fad warbles along in the background: no one really wants to date their parents, regardless of what Freud might say.

            A film is a tricky one to manage.  Inevitably someone will have to make a sacrifice at selection time and is going to be fighting urges to throw popcorn at the person with annoying hair a few rows ahead.  There’s the issue of whether to share the Minstrels or invest in a packet each, and is it just me who feels awkward sitting in silence alongside someone I don’t know, even if all social norms dictate that that is the right thing to do in the cinema?

            Dinner is an option, but it’s very high risk.  There are far too many opportunities to spill, dribble or choke and no-one can really bring themselves to escape out the toilet window before the starter is finished, no matter how dire and hopeless the evening is turning out to be.

            So we need some new suggestions for date locations to bring us up to speed with the twenty first century.  Places need to be quiet but not dull, of equal interest to both parties, with little need for consumables and flexible enough to allow people to either linger or scarper at the first sign of danger.  Jeez, it’s no wonder we’re all turning to the internet…

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